it's getting harder to believe in anything

I just don't know what to do. I'm sick and tired of getting left behind, of only being there when it's convienant, of getting left behind to sit in the hallway by myself.

I went to Alex's seminar to see him, to work on each others' stuff and spend the second to last seminar ever with him. But no. No, 7 minutes into it, he gets pulled off to practice. The guy could have told him last night, but he didn't, so I got to sit in the hallway by myself and look like a complete and utter loser.

I'm sick of it.

I'm always left behind, I'm always the second choice, I'm always the last one picked. But, hey, if you have some huge problem, guess who's the first person you come to, whether you know me that well or not.

I hate this. I hate it, I hate it, I hate it.